Hey Rangers,

Yeah, hi. It's been a while. We've had our issues in the past. What with one of us being owned by George W Bush and one of us breaking Halladay's leg and crushing hopes and dreams for 2005, and his chance to start the All Star Game that year.

Yeah, it's been rough. A lot of mean things were said. Cruel things. But this thing you are doing, where you touch up the Yankees for 6 runs in game 3 and shut them out in a playoff game for the first time ever. And the previous game, when you violated Phil Hughes? Really good stuff. But letting the Yankees storm back in game 1 was the wrong move, because game 4 would've been decisive. The only thing standing between you and the World Series would've been AJ Burnett. Around these parts he's called the Cheese Doodle.

But a 10-3 whooping of the Yankees will have to do for now. So ride the power of Parkes' soul back to Arlington and into the World Series.