And then....

And then, Parkes didn't mention my blog in his DJF blog roundup...which means two things : 1. I don't update enough. 2. Parkes sucks a little.


And then, Mike Mussina announced his retirement. The Tao covers it. To paraphrase Cito Gaston, Mike Mussina can kiss my ass and I will blog that...

And then, I saw Twilight opening night, not because I love the books (I don't, they are shitty, not even good shitty but ashamed to be seen with shitty) or because freaking Cedric Diggory is a hot piece of thankfully of age ass (because, though I am ashamed to admit it, he is), but because I was asked to. Not only do these vampires sparkle in sunlight (WTF is that? You should burn!) but they apparently play baseball. And wear old-timey uniforms while doing it. This movie was like The Lost Boys, without the Coreys and extra Emo. Like huge doses of Emo. Save your money and behold the cheese:

Want Some Cheese?

with that whinge, JP? While the Yankees have stepped up and offered AJ 80 million/5 years and rumours of the Red Sox following suite swirling around, JP has taken time out to bitch about the economy. Yes, the economy sucks now, but the Canadian dollar was awesome last year and no big deals were made. So shut up. Anybody else tired of excuses?

And AJ? I love you, but if you sign with the Yankees, I hope you go Pavano on them and get your ass booed everywhere you go. And if you try to pull the shit you did in Toronto in Boston, you'd get strung up by your jockstrap.

And rat boy Pedroia is AL MVP. But Neyer on ESPN doesn't like it, which makes me like Neyer by default.

And just because I can't have a post without mentioning Manny, the Sox were on the brink of suspending him for refusing to play. Manny said his knee was sore, and told Tito he couldn't play, but continued to play and play well. Whatever. Boston sucks anyway.

I fucking hate the MLB sometimes. But at least I don't have off-centered Nickelback ads on my site.

Something beautiful, something free?

So a black man (a totally awesome one too) is headed for the White House and I wore a tube top (well, with a sweater) on November 5th. In Canada. Needless to say, the world has gone mental.

Luckily, AJ Burnett opted out of his contract, restoring some sort of balance. What was expected happened.

The Star had an article the other day, more or less outlining the various ways AJ is a bad ballplayer, a bad teammate and a bad husband. Examples include:

The fans "loved" him, even though most (which is more or less echoed in the comments on the article) bitch non-stop about him. Some is warranted, some is just annoying. Stop sounding like Leaf fans. So the idea that AJ is somehow well loved in Toronto (by more than just his teammates and well, me) smells quite a lot like bullshit.

He wants more money than the Jays are paying Halladay. And that would send a bad message to everyone, especially Doc. Ok, I'm going to say this, and people might not like it, but here goes. I love Roy Halladay for everything he is, everything he does. He is God among men. But Doc made his bed. He agreed to his contract. He wanted to stay for that money. These things are mutually exclusive, in my opinion. Well, of course it's my opinion. Whose blog is it?

An ailing Ted Rogers sent his love to AJ. Personal love. And AJ doesn't give a rip...how do we know this? Did he have a press conference where he said, "Screw your love, old man, gimme your cable money...I want my own station, bitch, or I'll unplug you."

And perhaps the most amusing/ annoying bit of the whole piece: "his wife wants him out of Toronto and back home, near Baltimore, where she can keep an eye on him. (Those eight limo rides a year, round trip, between Toronto and her Maryland home that are part of his contract apparently didn't satisfy.) He surely would want to be closer to his family all season and no one could fault him for that. "

Keep an eye on him, huh? This mysterious Karen Burnett has been a curiousity of mine since I heard him address her as "baby" in his opening press conference (which I don't think she attended) and then I heard about the damn limo rides. Which I like almost as much as the Jays supporting Troy Glaus' wife's horse habit (the infamous pony clause.) Isn't the point of having a rich husband so he pays for all your randomness? Not that I know from experience.

Apparently, according to people I knew who worked as ushers at the Rog Mahal, she is pretty hot, yet I can't seem to find a picture of her. Anybody know?

Hey you, what do you see?

Ballplayers get into all sorts of shanigans in the offseason









The other thing they do, these crazy ballplayers in the offseason, is opt out of their contracts and file for free agency. But not before teasing unneccessarily. Stupid AJ. All the drama.

That's Brad Penny (massive dude in brown shirt) amongst the LA brawlers in the TMZ video, sort of air punching and encouraging bleeps.

Show Pony in his briefs with other men...typical Saturday night.